dear chevy's at 3rd and howard,
a group of officemates and i dined at your restaurant today. the occasion? to celebrate a coworker's birthday! she had a huge craving for your enchiladas, and we all thought, "¡celebremos! ¡vamos a la chevy's!" yet that's where the cheer and good fun ended. practically 2 hours later, we left scratching our heads and staring confusedly at each other, and so, for the future, to help you help your own customers, i put this little list together.
* 7 people sit down at a round table. 1 server takes everyone's orders. 40 minutes later, 1 order arrives. still another 40 minutes later, no more orders arrive. deduce how long it would take train A and train B to meet. confused? yeah, so are we.
* please train us, your customers, in the appropriate codified Chevy's gestures/hand signals. sadly, we normally dine at other fine establishments (such as Pazzia, Koh Samui & the Monkey, and everyone's local favorite, Whole Foods), so we assume that the general motions of waving our arms, shaking our hands, jumping up and down, and actually speaking to our waiter/server/pseudo manager (see next bullet!) will bring attention to the fact that we're still waiting for los burritos while the tables around us are happily drunk off margaritas and couldn't tell a flauta from a fajita. think of it like we're about to get on a plane. where is our flotation device, and how do we express that we're losing oxygen quickly? and would we get a better response if we just keeled over?
* the manager (we'll call her the big enchilada) doesn't want to approach our table, as apparently 7 young plucky things scare her half to death. instead, she promotes a server (yet not our own) to manager for this "special occasion." what kind of crack is she smoking, and where can we get some?
normally, when we eat at chevy's (which is a rare occurrence in and of itself) or any other food service locale, we note that we need to get back to work in about an hour (as in one or 1, not 2 or 3!). this is pretty typical for the fidi and soma areas, and we've never had a problem. ever. until now. how long is too long? well, we lost one of our party during lunch. not to starvation, mind you, but she had to go back to work (when her 60 minute break was up. her food, on the other hand, appeared somewhere around the minute 100). luckily the rest of us have nice bosses (or at least ambivalent ones), so while we stayed to finally nibble our smoking (literally) food, we felt confident that when we got back to work, we'd still be gainfully employed. if not, though, we feel pleased to know (from experience!) that chevy's may be in need for some competent new employees.