it's like s&m, but without the s and the m

sorry for the lack of posting. i've been chained to my desk at work, slaving away for the good of society. they only let me out for bathroom breaks and coffee (hot chocolate) runs. and the occasional return to the abode for meals, sleep, and requisite showers. cross your fingers that life returns to normal soon. or "normal."or some form of normalacy. please.

it's hump day

this morning, i put on my sneakers and "powerwalked" to a breakfast meeting at zazie. i wasn't looking forward to the meeting, but the thought of pounding the pavement to the sounds of gasolina just got me all revved up and ready to groove. plus, i was proud of myself for putting my underwear on right-side out. oh yes. today is going to be a good day.

but what would michael kors think?

and it's a real company, too!

where is the the luv?

i got a valentine's package from my grandmother (and my grandfather, although i'm pretty sure she does all the shopping and yapping), and it sat on my desk for half a day. petrified to open it, i wondered if it could be some hideously huge and clunky belt like my mom recently received or a serving spoon or two like her significant other got (never say you need a spoon in front of my grandmother. you'll get teaspoons, ladles, and jewelry made out of spoons within a week's time, accompanied by a letter on yellow notepad paper detailing their lifetime and beyond histories).

right. so before trudging home, i dutifully opened up the package and low and behold, todd receives a tomato-colored sweater - not too shabby-, but i get this stretch lace black shirt with ruffles. ruffles. and a stretch lace button down shirt with slightly bell sleeves? how did she know that this is exactly what i needed to round out my wardrobe? and to make matters worse, her card said it made her think of me because it's "classy."

have you herd...

todd showed me this last weekend, and i had to look at it again today, just for a good old fashioned laugh. and yes, it's an actual ad.

brakes on the cake

for v-day, i had planned to make todd his favorite cake ever. a boston creme pie. which is a cake and not a pie. i'd never made one before, so i researched vigorously and after much hard thought, picked my recipes carefully. i layed out a whole day to make it, allowing enough time for the cakes to cool, the custard to congeel, and the chocolate ganache topping to chill... but what i didn't figure in was a plan b. now, i normally have a plan b somewhere in the back of my mind, and not plan b the contraception, but plan b that saves your ass when others are yelling "abort, abort!" and running right and left to evacuate from the space station. so i put the top part of the cake on the custard, and dum-dah-dum! it all ran off. guess i didn't heat it long enough to solidify just right. so now it's a yellow cake with a moat of custard and a partial ganache topping with added heart sprinkles for extra flair and flirtation. whoa is me. and all todd got was a stupid t-shirt. too bad it didn't say "my girlfriend screwed up my cake and all i got was this lowsy t-shirt."



two things that did turn out well this weekend were the apple puff pastry with raspberry sauce for breakfast and chocolate covered orange peel. yum. hopefully these made up for the disasterous cake/pie from hell!

4200 minutes

today i found out i'm expected to be putting in at least 12 hour days for the next 6 weeks. what a great valentine's gift! now, if i was paid more, that wouldn't be too awful, but i make half the pesos that my boss makes, and as i don't get overtime, i make just about what the assistant earns. this really doesn't seem fair, yet i'm not sure where to go from here. sure, i'm not off saving the world from evil green monsters from mars or organizing a rally to support potholes' rights on residential streets or finding a cure for chronic boredom, but c'mon. 70 hours? i might as well become a lawyer. or a doctor. or a... non-profit employee for a high school? no es posible.

be my valentine

in case you didn't know:

i never met a chocolate i didn't like.

on a whim, we stopped by the ghirardelli store at union square friday night before heading over to ybca. ok, acutally, we stopped by ghirardelli before also stopping by the apple store before then heading to ybca. and apple totally overwhelmed me, both with the prices and the ipod. so cute. yet in a year, so obsolete. anyway, after eating a wonderful meal at golden era, we needed a little sweetness to make the tastebuds all happy, and what do you know, but ghirardelli has some new dark chocolate bars that are out of this world. really. much better than the watered down mass-produced chocolate you normally associate with the company. we tried the citrus sunset, "intense dark chocolate with orange bits and almond crunch." heaven. pure heaven. plus, the decadent and smooth chocolate taste helped get me through kunst-stoff. but you probably won't find this at your normal ghirardelli purveyor, such as walgreens. oh no. but go to the store, sample the hot fudge, then look towards the right side, and you will be rewarded with cocoa bliss. just promise to avoid anything that says "milk chocolate."

KUNST-STOFF review

Sight Slightly Unseen

KUNST-STOFF
Presented by Yerba Buena Center for the Arts
February 10, 2006, 8PM

Photo by Andy Mogg

Yannis Adoniou’s KUNST-STOFF, a local dance-theater company, is known for their risk-taking and originality. But with all risk-taking, sometimes you get a bang and others a bust, and the ensemble’s two-day run at Yerba Buena kicked off last night with only a slight rumble.

For more, go here.

another veggie tale

this week's veggie box included two of my least favorite vegetables, leeks and rutabaga. it's not that i don't like the taste, but there's not much you can make with them. sure, you can put leeks on a salad or in a pasta sauce... and that's it. and rutabaga? you can puree them. or broil them. or saute them. but what goes well with rutabaga? not leeks. there's a huge lack of recipes out there for the root vegetable. but they're sort of like turnips, vegetables that have been forgotten by today's tomato/carrot/other veggie peoples. they also have a slightly bitter taste, and also just look... different. but i must say, leeks and rutagaba kick brussel sprouts ass!

ooga chaka ooga ooga

don't know what to do for you valentine? want something that screams animal lust? and in santa rosa? then look no further. safari west is offering "wild jungle love," an adults-only sex tour, dinner, and dance. plus, if you're in love (or inebriated) you can expand your trip and stay the night with some of those randy animals.

now, as a side note, this brings back bad bad bad memories. when todd's mom met my mom, things started smoothly. we went to dinner, everyone was cordial, and then todd's mom suggested watching a video from their recent trip to africa. we pop it into the vcr back at campus, and what are we watching, but two lions totally getting it on! my mom seemed a little mortified, and i just wanted to run for the hills. embarassment is putting it lightly.

anyway, i don't know if this is a turn on or not, but some people must go to this thing. more details below:

About the sex tour - Rumble in the Jungle We're putting a different spin on our educational safari tours with the 5^th annual Safari West Adult Sex Tour. Pile into an open-air safari vehicle and drive out among some of the world’s most exotic and enthralling creatures for a wild safari tour led by Safari West’s animal experts as they probe the revealing “Ins and Outs” of Wildlife courtship. You'll learn intimate details about the mating habits of African mammals and birds including Bongo, Giraffe, Eland, Wildebeest, Gazelle, Zebra, Warthog, Cheetah and more! …When a male warthog wants to attract a female, he does a courtship “chant” of rhythmic grunts that sounds like an engine in need of a tune-up. Yes, love is in the air!

You'll even discover amazing facts about domestic animals and insects, like the common fruit fly, which has the longest sperm of any living creature.

This hot ticket begins with a champagne and chocolate reception followed by a safari in an open-air vehicle among some of the world's most exotic creatures. Then, it's time to kick up your hooves (or paws) and party into the night with our very own DJ. Can a holiday get any more wildly romantic?

you are so out

every so often, when i need a little pick-me-up, i head over to bluefly. not to buy anything, mind you, but to realize that there are some crazy people out there. now say crazy with me, but in that molly shannon voice. you know, kah-raaaaaaaaa-zee.

michael kors has apparently lost his mind. maybe it's because he's spending a couple hours a week listening to heidi klum's clipped and limited english. or perhaps it has something to do with him being more talk and less walk. he keeps yapping away about how he knows today's modern american woman and that she should never be wearing a fashion don't because yaddayaddayadda. anyway, kors doesn't seem to even listen to himself (and why would he? really, his jibber-jabber borders on the annoying as in i'd-almost-prefer-to-watch-PAX annoying). kors has created one hideous dress, and while it retails for $2,800, you can have it for a measly $1,680. what a steal. on his part. i bet he's cackling all the way to the bank. or at least back to parsons.

x marks the spot

one of my coworkers lent me the dvds of season 1 of lost, and i must admit, it's addicting. all the drama, mystery, and scenery is enough to convince me to schedule in quality ass-meets-couch time every wednesday for new episodes. i have one more disc to go, and then i can officially move on to season 2. the best part, though, is when they're in the jungle and someone always says "are we lost?" and i want to scream "no. of course not!" and what happens when all the hoarded deodorant runs out?

we'd like to check-in, please.

my mom and her significant other (kevin's past the acquaintance, boytoy, and boyfriend stages, so i guess he's significant other now!) might visit in june, and i realized i only have 4 1/2 months to plan! i love planning for guests- not sure why exactly, but i enjoy thinking about all the great restaurants to take them to and all the wonderful views to show them and which shops to poke around in... and now i need to create a list separate from the july list for potential sister visit. (i know a few things not to include like riding the westin "outdoor" elevators straight to the top--mom almost blew chunks!--and driving up and then down the fillmore hill. heights, especially those that creep up on you quickly, are not a good idea.) so far, motherly list includes:

potential restaurants

• kokkari - love love love. veggies options plus non-veggie. big, airy, modern architecture with definite greek/med influences. impeccable service.
• minako - duh. inventive sushi and an experience not to miss.
• golden era - all veggie vietnamese in the tenderloin. now, yes, i take my mom to the tenderloin. in fact, we've been before, and 4 years laters, she's still raving about it! a few years ago, two of her friends were in town, and they insisted we go, too, so it's catching on:)
• mescolanza - perfect traditional italian in the richmond. really, the best italian is not in in north beach. i promise.
• the richmond - a new bistro and wine bar on balboa. it's a locals' secret, but the word's getting out. great wine list, plus the chef really goes the extra mile in service and presentation. yum.
• sociale - we've been to sociale before, but it's always an option again. sitting outside is the best, under the stars. great heating lamps and cobblestone patio. one of the best wine lists in the city.
• feel real cafe - the food's good, and it's all dairy-free so the kevster will be safe, plus we can walk to the beach afterwards (or before. or both)! because when you're not living on the beach in florida, you should visit all other beaches.
  

places to go and see

• golden gate bridge - it took me 5 years to walk it, but it was beautiful, and i wish i'd done it sooner.
• hot cookie - over on castro. where else can you get a penis cookie covered in chocolate and boob ones with sprinkles? i said boob. hehehehehe!
• saturday farmers' market at the ferry building - we went before and it was fun. lots of samples, plus seeing real tomatoes. sigh.
• views - land's end, baker beach, randall museum, crissy field.
• wine tasting - especially at the little known wineries. mmm. lush.
  

got the skinny?

does this seem a little extreme to anyone? water to make you skinny? and at amazon.com, they tout that the product amazingly has zero calories, as if regular water doesn't already have.... zero calories. and they say it's 100% natural water while it also contains added "nutrients" to help curb your appetite. seems like a scam to me! good job, amazon.

road to recovery

for the next few days, i have a little pillow haven set up in the living room. last night, i slept with pillows all around me on the futon so i wouldn't
1) roll around and make myself worse
2) bang myself against the futon arms
3) get squished by todd
4) and hopefully sleep well

and it worked well! in fact, even with the vicodin, i'm surprised how well i snoozed considering the pain, the cat, and all.


my coworkers also sent me these gorgeous flowers yesterday from bloomers, and i must say, bloomers does a great job. without a doubt, talk to patric and he'll set you up with the best looking bouquet ever!

first i was afraid, i was petrified

surgery's complete, and i'm home to rest and recuperate. yippee! i think the anesthesiologist was my favorite because she had the badass drugs. oh yeah.

so something i wish i could do this weekend but can't:

YogaStudio Opens
What: Free classes to celebrate the launch of Pac Heights’s new fancy-pants health haven
Why: Show your partner you know how to be flexible.
When: Sat. & Sun., 1-4:30 p.m.
Where: 1823 Divisadero St., b/t Bush & Pine Sts. (415-292-5600)

dum dee dum dum duuuuuuuum

so tomorrow's the big day. gotta be at the hospital at 6am so that they can rip out gently remove my gallbladder and then within 2 hours, send me on my merry way home to cling on to todd as i climb up 4 flights of stairs. i'll be hanging out at home for about a week, recuperating, watching netflix (which was recently upgraded to 5-at-a-time), and slightly drugged. you may not hear from me for a few days, which is probably the safest option for everyone. most likely if i posted tomorrow evening it would go something like:

i see stars and moons and birdies! ooooo, here birdy. i like the purple ones. and the orioles. did you know that baltimore orioles are black and orange? that's what alex said on jeopardy last week. now, if there had been a gallstone in my duct, then i would have been in jeopardy. yep. and did you know that duct tape is a great way to keep me quiet? uhuhuh. let's see what happens when i tape my mouth shut. ........................................................................................................................
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